Oh hello 22. My belly officially sits in my lap, my belly button pokes straight out and my feet are slowly starting to disappear. This morning Carter and I sat in bed talking about "bebe" and he showed me that he too has a "bebe" in his belly! We sat talking about the Bebe in our bellies for quite a long time so of course I had to snap a photo of this moment that is so precious to me. I know he won't understand, and truly he won't get it even after the baby arrives but its so fun watching his mind work around the idea. All he knows is that daddy gives lots of lovin' to mommies belly, it's called a baby, and he apparently has one too!
This week the baby has officially hit 1 pound and is 1 foot in length! Grow baby grow! These last few weeks until viability at 24 weeks always go by slowly for me as I wait anxiously for the "date" in time in which I can rest comfortably knowing that no matter what happens, everyone will do their best to help our little one. To think that we have 18 more weeks until our due date and 19 more weeks max makes me get butterflies (or maybe those are kicks..) and also makes me feel a little ill. I constantly have to remind myself that no matter how many books I read or classes that I took while pregnant with Carter I was still unprepared. I didn't know what it would be like or how to survive motherhood until I was there and in the moment, that is just how I function. I can try all I want to get ready for this baby, create a step-by-step plan and get a grip on what life will be like with two under two but it won't happen. I will learn as I go, and maybe that's better. It saves me from creating a false idea of what life could be like and allows me just to bask in the life that falls into place just as it should.
For those who are just now jumping in, we love to wait on the gender until birth. We love the surprise! We did with Carter and had every intention of doing it again, however during the ultrasound we both saw "the goods" and later that evening confessed it to each other.. only to find out that I know without a doubt that I saw little lady parts and my husband is 100% set on the fact that he saw little man parts. So our surprise is still alive! However.. I've caught AJ looking at bows, girly items and he's even slipped and called the baby Pennelope (Poppy for short). But he isn't the only one, I too have referred to the baby as Henry on occasion. Because we don't have the actual potty shot itself in our hands, as time goes on it gets harder and harder to visualize what we both thought we saw but no matter the case I cannot forget the fact that my heart about skipped a beat when I saw those three white lines again and again and again. I'm at the point where I feel like maybe because I am so darn set on knowing what I saw (and knowing my husband can't read an ultrasound to save his life) that I just have to be wrong because that's how life is for me! It's always full of twists and turns and big surprises and I wouldn't have it any other way. I feel I've never been more sure but question myself everyday. Either way we know a few things for sure, we are blessed, this baby is so loved, and we cannot wait!
Happy 22 weeks tiny little one.
-T
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