During Carters pregnancy it was amazing to me to see so much personality from an unborn child, I knew in my heart that he would truly be just like his father (whether he came out a boy or a girl, as we didn't know until birth!) and sure enough he is his fathers little twin. They are both silly but eternally calm and collected beings, they enjoy a little peace and quiet, they go out of their way to ensure the happiness of others around them, do anything to get you to smile, and are not afraid to show their feelings. While Carter was in the womb his movements were always slow and fluid and he was seemingly calm all the time. Never bothered by loud noises around me or anyone poking and prodding at him from the outside world, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was going to give birth to a peaceful and independent child and that is just what I got!
This pregnancy itself has been wildly different, but the actions and personality of this little child have been new to me as well.. although very recognizable. This baby will be just like me, and as much as that can make me smile it slightly terrifies me a bit as I knew what a strong minded, motivated, go-getter wild-child I was. One of the things that I stand firmly behind is that we all as humans embrace a love language, and it's not often that two of the same love languages come together! My husband has a love language of quality time while I am big on physical touch. One of the best ways to keep any relationship alive is being able to recognize the difference in love language and adjust, I want to kiss and hug and love on AJ but he feels most love if we go to fun activities to spend quality time with one another. There are 5 languages of love that one can relate to:
1. Words of Affirmation - You feel most loved when hearing words such as "I Love You", "You are Beautiful to me" and in turn that is how you show your love best, by telling others exactly how you feel.
2. Acts of Service - You feel most loved when someone offers to do kind things for you, such as your husband coming home and offering to cook and clean up for you after a hard day. And in turn you show your love in the same way, by preforming kind acts towards those you care about.
3. Receiving Gifts - You feel most loved when receiving flowers, a gift or even a simple card from those whom you love. In turn you tend to show others that you love them most by going out of your way to get them little gifts here and there.
4. Quality Time - You feel most loved when being able to spend time with someone uninterrupted and doing things you both enjoy. In turn, you tend to create fun things to do whether it's just working in the yard or going fishing in order to spend time with those you care about in hopes they feel your love.
5. Physical Touch - The kisses, hugs, hand holding and cuddling during a movie are what you desire most to feel loved. In turn you are quick to dish out acts of physical touch to let others know how much you love them.
It has been very apparent since birth that Carter and I did not share the same love language! He has never needed my hugs or kisses and even as a newborn desired to be out of our arms and independent. When I shower him with physical touch he gets overwhelmed, therefor I had to learn that he shows and receives love in different ways and just like his father he is a fan of quality time. If I am cooking he wants to help, if he is building blocks he wants my presence, he adores going to daddy's softball games and just spending time with each of us. One of the most beautiful things about a child is how attentive they are, and without any knowledge of these "love languages" Carter knows that I deeply desire his physical affection and goes out of his way each day to shower me with the hugs, kisses and cuddles he knows I have been waiting for.
Our second child and I share the same love language. My wild crazy womb baby adores nothing more than my hands on my belly, poking back and forth as we get to know each other. We spend all day loving on each other from two different worlds. Each time I have ever had a worry during the pregnancy this little one sends me kicks and nudges immediately after my thought in order to let me know that he or she is doing just fine. If there are loud noises or if big brother is a little too rough around the belly all it takes is for us to connect in a physical way to lull baby back to sleep.
23 weeks in and not a day goes by without loads of excitement. As we inch closer and closer I find myself more anxious at the thought of being a mother to two under two, but is this not life's greatest gift? I get two tiny humans to love and adore for all of their days. 17 more weeks until we are blessed yet again.
Take a quiz to find out your own love language as well as the love language of your children by clicking HERE
-T
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