Ultrasound Oops.

(WARNING: You must read from start to finish before becoming too excited about anything. As promised the story will either make you laugh or want to rip your hair out. Reader discretion is advised.)

My husband and I get called crazy all the time for wishing to keep the gender a secret. Truth is, I thought my husband was a big ol' basket of crazy when he told me he didn't want to know what Carter was. I said that there was no way that I was okay with it and there was no way it was going to happen. It didn't take me long to change my mind after seeing how much it meant to my husband, there are lots of sacrifices and choices that we make in a marriage and this was our first one. It was the first time that AJ had told me something that he wanted to do for our first born child, it was his first fatherly decisions and I declined it. What I did know is that I loved this man with every inch of my being and I would do anything for him, and so I agreed. The weeks passed and truly it never got unbearable, we were always just super excited to meet this little person and when the time came it was truly as if time stood still. There is no comparable moment to meeting your child and being told what you've been waiting so so long for. After I got to experience this moment I craved it.. I am an absolute addict to this sweet surprise so it was a no brainer that we would yet again wait to find out the gender of our second child.

The night before our ultrasound with our second child, I dreamed that I saw the gender on the screen. I woke up scared and ready to go into this letting everyone know exactly what the plan was and was going to avoid this at all costs. But believe me.. dreams do come true. Not too long into our ultrasound our sweet and wonderful technician made an oops and there it was.. a straight potty shot right in front of my face as if I was reliving my dream.

Three bright bold white little lines stared me right in the face.

The fact that I saw the parts of my precious little Poppy girl was so much more shocking to me than the fact that I was actually pregnant with a girl in the first place. For some reason, after having Carter I felt as if I was simply a boy mom. A boy making machine. I was incapable of creating a little girl, it was just something that my body didn't do! The tech saw me see Pennelope's parts and also was highly concerned as I turned a horrible shade of white and had to keep asking me how I was feeling.. well.. I was certainly surprised! After the incident the tech was a little less careful and I saw what I think I saw again a few more times at a glance. She never announced it to me because she knew my husband couldn't understand what he was looking at and thank goodness because I wanted the surprise to remain real for him.

The tech left the room and it was eerily silent. AJ knew that I saw something and insisted that I share it with him. I refused because I wanted to hold onto as much of the surprise as possible! It was the most awkward moment of being overjoyed yet sad that I felt as if my surprise was ruined in some way. I spent those quite moments thinking back to Carters birth and reliving the experience and realizing that I was wrong.. it wasn't my surprise that I craved. It was AJ's. I made sure the entire room was silent as our first born was brought into the world and wanted AJ to announce what it was we had waiting so long for. Seeing him start to cry and share that it was the little boy we had been dreaming of and witnessing him become a father was everything that I needed. THAT was the surprise I craved. My surprise was far from ruined!

The day went on and AJ left for work, I spent all day googling girl ultrasound photos and was certain that I saw correctly although the tech didn't include any potty shots to send home with us for me to look back and make sure. That evening AJ came home bursting through the front door saying "Taylor you can just tell me, I saw it too it's okay it wasn't your fault!!" I wasn't sure what he was saying he saw so I insisted over and over again that he share with me what gender he thought our baby was and I knew exactly what was coming..

"The baby has a penis!!"

A what.. the baby has a what??! I started laughing uncontrollably as he begged me to tell him what was going on, I shared that there was no penis that I was aware of and we sat and fought back and forth. Both of us just KNOWING that we saw what we saw and being 100% certain of our genders.

So here we are again.. left entirely confused yet never more sure of anything in our lives. To me we are having a little girl, to AJ it is absolutely another little baby boy. One of us is right we know that much, but God has a great sense of humor and was able to give me back some of the surprise that I thought had been stripped away from me. No more ultrasounds, no more opportunities, just a constant battle for the next 20 weeks as we both gear up to fight to be right. I keep reminding him that we both "swung" for a boy at conception, a boy is what we thought would fit best and so clearly it was a big deal that I was admitting to it being a girl. I kept telling him that the umbilical chord can play mind games and that when he said he saw a penis we were focused on the belly not the butt.. but NO, he saw a penis without a doubt.

AJ.. let me just say this. I love you. But I do not lose. Bets will be made, you will lose and all at the same time we will be overjoyed at the birth of our newest little one and will BOTH be just as surprised and happy as ever. Visit our instagram and let us know, are you thinking we will be meeting #misspoppy or #misterhenry and prepare to endure this long hilarious wait with us!

Bring it on Hubbs.

-T